Witness Protection Program Places High-Profile Mob Informant on Kansas City Royals

Friends of ours: Junior Gotti, John Gotti

The Kansas City Royals added a new rightfielder yesterday – a 5-foot-8, 275 pound, 53-year old mob informant the federal witness protection placed with the team as a means to keep him out of public view.

Listed on the roster as "Jim Smith," the new Royal is reportedly Vinnie Macaluso, a construction foreman and Mafioso from New Jersey who is preparing to testify for the government in the trial of John A. Gotti, the son of late mob boss John Gotti.

No one from the Federal Witness Protection program would comment on record about "Smith," but an anonymous source within the department confirmed Macaluso was placed with the Royals. "We couldn't think of a place where a person is more likely to go unnoticed than with the Kansas City Royals," said the source. "By playing with them we can be assured no one will ever find him because his face will never be on television and because almost no one attends their games."

"Smith" reportedly has never played baseball in his life, something the Witness Protection program thinks works to their advantage. "Since he'll probably be striking out all the time and dropping fly balls and falling down and stuff, he'll fit in perfectly with the Royals and won't raise flags with anyone," said the source. "We heard he could actually play a little bit of football, so that's why we didn't place him with the Arizona Cardinals."

Thanks to the Sports Pickle